Eleven months ago I began a journey of practicing mindfulness every day and we've reached day 350. Yesterday, I talked about overcoming the shadow within. Today is a new day.
Japan isn't the only place like this though. Every society has its social dynamics and trends that we're generally expected to follow if we want to fit in. It's become normal for people to do certain things, listen to certain music, and have certain beliefs. If you don't fit in those categories, then you're "weird" and weird people aren't "normal". People start to question you (some to genuinely understand you, others to see what's "wrong" with you) and it's as if it's not okay to have my own tastes (despite their being a vast sea of options out there, some people expect me to like specific ones? Really?). Just because a lot of people think Drake is amazing, doesn't mean his music is amazing (it does nothing for me). The music I like may not be the most popular, but it's damn good to me and that's good enough.
As someone who values their individuality, it drives me crazy and is also weird that I moved to country that values group-think as much as Japan does. That said, living in Japan has taught me a lot about getting over my ego and follow group-oriented ways. I used to be the type who always did things by himself and tried as little as possible to ask for help. As a result I often distanced myself from others and in a way it made me hard to talk to. I was very selfish. Since coming to Japan, I'm learning the value of seeing things from others' point of view and trying to work around their needs as well as my own. Learning to do things as others do has widened my perspective and has helped me change my opinion on some things. It's also made me more sociable and open to trying things a different way from my own.
In the end though, it's all a balancing act. Learning when to go with the crowd and when to stand firm with what you believe in is about recognizing what's really important to you. Life is a game and playing by its rules helps keep you under the radar when it comes to trouble, but holding on to your own values is just as important in creating your own identity. Just because you do things the same as some other people doesn't mean you're not your own person. When I think about it, I do a lot of things the same way as other people do yet I also do a lot of things that don't fit the norm. Figuring out where you wanna stand out says a lot about yourself. It shows what really matters to you and that's key to seeing where you can truly shine.
Peace
"You don't need to follow trends to be stylish." - Naomie HarrisIn Japan, following the herd is valued. Being with the group and following the group-way is something that shows that you're a "part of the team" and "with the people". In a lot of ways that's a great thing, but in some cases it's not so ideal. A lot of people live healthy and are able to accomplish a lot by following the standards and expectations set by their peers, but then you also have "mandatory" drinking parties that you may not want to go to but do because you don't want your work relationships to break down. There may be a lot of good intent in them, but not everyone wants to be the same as everyone else and that's okay.
Japan isn't the only place like this though. Every society has its social dynamics and trends that we're generally expected to follow if we want to fit in. It's become normal for people to do certain things, listen to certain music, and have certain beliefs. If you don't fit in those categories, then you're "weird" and weird people aren't "normal". People start to question you (some to genuinely understand you, others to see what's "wrong" with you) and it's as if it's not okay to have my own tastes (despite their being a vast sea of options out there, some people expect me to like specific ones? Really?). Just because a lot of people think Drake is amazing, doesn't mean his music is amazing (it does nothing for me). The music I like may not be the most popular, but it's damn good to me and that's good enough.
As someone who values their individuality, it drives me crazy and is also weird that I moved to country that values group-think as much as Japan does. That said, living in Japan has taught me a lot about getting over my ego and follow group-oriented ways. I used to be the type who always did things by himself and tried as little as possible to ask for help. As a result I often distanced myself from others and in a way it made me hard to talk to. I was very selfish. Since coming to Japan, I'm learning the value of seeing things from others' point of view and trying to work around their needs as well as my own. Learning to do things as others do has widened my perspective and has helped me change my opinion on some things. It's also made me more sociable and open to trying things a different way from my own.
In the end though, it's all a balancing act. Learning when to go with the crowd and when to stand firm with what you believe in is about recognizing what's really important to you. Life is a game and playing by its rules helps keep you under the radar when it comes to trouble, but holding on to your own values is just as important in creating your own identity. Just because you do things the same as some other people doesn't mean you're not your own person. When I think about it, I do a lot of things the same way as other people do yet I also do a lot of things that don't fit the norm. Figuring out where you wanna stand out says a lot about yourself. It shows what really matters to you and that's key to seeing where you can truly shine.
Where do you fit in with the crowd? Where do you wanna shine?
Peace
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| Where do you fit in? |
Have a great day~
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