Seven months ago I began a journey of practicing mindfulness every day and we've reached day 240. Yesterday, I talked about making the best of our situation. Today is a new day.
Today didn't have the most positive start. I woke up feeling kinda down my thoughts spiraled into a train of disappointment in what I could be doing and what I'm not. The ideal life I wish I could be living and the life I have. The frustration of knowing that I should be thankful for what I have and the contrarian nature of these thoughts. It's like I've made progress but I haven't. I felt lost. Although my understanding has increased, there's still something lacking in my self-actualization and figuring out what is and what I need to do to achieve it is my current conundrum.
Life is a giant contradiction. The more I make efforts into making my life better the more uncertain I become, yet with each brief fall I come back out reassured that everything will be alright. I make some progress again, I have new doubts, and the cycle continues. That seems to be the pattern in my life. Rise, stumble, get back up, rinse and repeat. It's usually during these falls that I'll find answers to my problems that help me rise and make progress.
Although I'm kind of in a dark place today, I know that I'll get out of it with time. Right now, I have to figure out what I can learn from this feeling and how I can apply that to my life to restore the balance. That's how you fight depression: identifying why you're sad and what you can do to change it. All that's left to do is execute that plan and take action. I'll figure it out.
Peace
"It is by going down into the abyss that we recover the treasures of life. Where you stumble, there lies your treasure." - Joseph CampbellThese last few weeks I'd hit a bit of a motivational slump that got me questioning everything: whether I should stay in Japan, if I should continue writing this blog, if what I'm doing has any real value, if I should spend my time doing other things, if I'm not working hard enough, if there's even any point in doing any of this? I was in a dark place and although my rational side knows better, our emotions don't and often get in our way, but that doesn't mean that they are to be ignored.
Today didn't have the most positive start. I woke up feeling kinda down my thoughts spiraled into a train of disappointment in what I could be doing and what I'm not. The ideal life I wish I could be living and the life I have. The frustration of knowing that I should be thankful for what I have and the contrarian nature of these thoughts. It's like I've made progress but I haven't. I felt lost. Although my understanding has increased, there's still something lacking in my self-actualization and figuring out what is and what I need to do to achieve it is my current conundrum.
Life is a giant contradiction. The more I make efforts into making my life better the more uncertain I become, yet with each brief fall I come back out reassured that everything will be alright. I make some progress again, I have new doubts, and the cycle continues. That seems to be the pattern in my life. Rise, stumble, get back up, rinse and repeat. It's usually during these falls that I'll find answers to my problems that help me rise and make progress.
Although I'm kind of in a dark place today, I know that I'll get out of it with time. Right now, I have to figure out what I can learn from this feeling and how I can apply that to my life to restore the balance. That's how you fight depression: identifying why you're sad and what you can do to change it. All that's left to do is execute that plan and take action. I'll figure it out.
Peace
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| It might be a slow process, but with enough diligence there's always a way. |
What's something you're struggling with?
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